Bacon, Eggs, Sauce of brown; O how may I demand satisfaction of thee?!?
Well, the idea came to me while shopping for ingredients for two seemingly unrelated meals: Let's cook a pasta dish containing only the staple ingredients of an English Breakfast (and pasta, obviously). Yeah, that'll learn 'em.
The more I thought about it, the bigger the challenge seemed. Instinctively linguine (or tagliatelli or spaghetti or whatever) is just crying out for a sauce of onions, basil, oregano, red wine, red peppers and parmesan - all things I'd have to do without.
Instead, I got to use bacon, sausage, table condiments and, as a radical gamble, pink grapefruit juice. It just felt right, and besides, there are plenty of dishes that call for lemon, lime and occasionally orange, so why not give the black sheep of the citrus family a rare outing?
And the recipe works. Pretty much. Just not as revenge.
It seemed obvious to whack a lightly poached egg on top and let the gooey yolk run into the linguine as a final flourish, so that's what I did.
But egg-poaching is fiendishly hard to get right, with a very poor effort-to-reward ratio, which is why I hardly ever attempt to poach eggs unless absolutely necessary.
Consequently, being all out of practice, I somehow managed to get a load of eggshell in the pan, reached in to remove it and succeeded in not only destroying the egg, but also burning my finger...
They fucking got me again.
Ingredients - serves any number
Smoked sausage, a couple, chopped into bite-size bits
Smoked Bacon, chopped
Eggs, one per person, to be poached at last minue
Pink Grapefruit juice