Bensoir! It's me, Benjamin. I like to eat and drink. And cook. And write.

You may have read stuff I've written elsewhere, but here on my own blog as Ben Viveur I'm liberated from the editorial shackles of others, so pretty much anything goes.

BV is about enjoying real food and drink in the real world. I showcase recipes that taste awesome, but which can be created by mere mortals without the need for tons of specialist equipment and a doctorate in food science. And as a critic I tend to review relaxed establishments that you might visit on a whim without having to sell your first-born, rather than hugely expensive restaurants and style bars in the middle of nowhere with a velvet rope barrier, a stringent dress code and a six-month waiting list!

There's plenty of robust opinion, commentary on the world of food and drink, and lots of swearing, so look away now if you're easily offended. Otherwise, tuck your bib in, fill your glass and turbo-charge your tastebuds. We're going for a ride... Ben Appetit!

Ben Viveur in Quotes

Ben Viveur says...

Ben Viveur on MEATliquor:
"the look and feel is the most authentically American I’ve ever seen in London, and with food served on greaseproof paper on plastic trays, and kitchen roll provided on every table instead of cutlery, it feels only a couple of guilty steps away from fucking your cousin over the bonnet of a rusting Buick behind the drive-thru."

Ben Viveur on Paul Hot Chocolate:

“It’s like the God of Cocoa ejaculating down your throat from a big, celestial chocolate cock!”

Ben Viveur on breakfast @ Simpson's in the Strand:

"the sort of plateful I'd expect to be served at a three star seaside hotel while listening to a couple from the West Midlands arguing about a roof rack."

Ben Viveur on best drinking practice:

"These days there are great pubs almost everywhere and it's worth travelling a little further or paying a little more occasionally to have a pint that makes you go 'WOWFUCK!!!' rather than chugging down gallons of uninspiring pisswater every night."

Ben Viveur on Romanian food:

“Chicken is almost non-existent on Romanian menus, with the notable exception of their livers which are widely available - sauteéd, deep-fried, and served as a thin paté with cheeses and salads - which rather makes you wonder what they do with the remainder of the creatures!"

Ben Viveur on festive hot drinks:

"Give me a naked flame, a handful of cloves and a cinnamon stick and I'll mull anything, me."

Ben Viveur on The Mayan:

"I've no idea how Ilkley succeeded where other brewers have fallen on their hot, chocolatey arses, but I'm guessing they used top quality ingredients and got the proportions exactly right."

Ben Viveur on his ‘Full English Breakfast linguine’ recipe:

"Be very careful when eating this meal: it combines breakfast and dinner ingredients, so you might get all confused and end up going to bed in the morning or something. In fact, fuck it. Do exactly that. It's a free country'n'shit. See if I care (which I don't, obviously)."

Ben Viveur on German Chimney Cake:

"It's a sort of hollow pastry pipe, baked to order, a bit like the outside of a strudel but with no filling. Or an extra-big cream horn that's more of a cylinder than a horn, and without any cream inside it. Yeah, I'm detecting the unterwhelm."

Others say about Ben Viveur...

"Oh My God ! I'm salivating just reading your recipes! More, More, More please !"
Danny Letton

"We've printed off your entire review and will be reading it to the staff during the week"
Haché Camden

"Boy, you are a damned fine writer, of whom I am actually envious!" 

"Spiced with acid wit"
Trevor Pyne

"Shame about the swearing on your blog, puts me right off."
Belinda Berry

1 comment:

Comments are always welcomed and encouraged, especially interesting, thought-provoking contributions and outrageous suggestions.