My final post under a Tory government

With just a few hours to go until polls close in today's General Election, we are on the verge of a change of government.

And this means that, unless every single opinion poll of the campaign is spectacularly wrong, my next blogpost will be the first under a Labour Prime Minister. Which is quite something when you think about it.

Ah, sweet, delicious freedom...

This blog began back in October 2010, which means that it has existed entirely under a Tory-led administration. Government has taken various forms - Majority, Minority and Coalition - but the five Prime Ministers we've had 'running the country' over these 14 years have all been Tories. 

As many readers will know, I used to be very active in party politics, but have become increasingly disillusioned with it in recent years, given the lack of any movement that really represents my Right-Libertarian views. Indeed, ahead of the last election, I suggested going for a pint instead of voting. 

Things have arguably got worse since then, and - from my perspective at least - will likely get slightly worse. However disappointed I am with the so-called 'Conservatives', my deep personal hatred for Labour runs even deeper, and this time there is a very real risk of an outcome where the makeup of government is even less reflective of the way people voted than usual, which means even more Authoritarianism running roughshod over our lives, preferences and appetites.

(Yes, I'm in favour of a more proportional electoral system and have been for literally my entire adult life, so don't give me any shit about FPTP biting me on my fat arse...)

What I will say is this: If you have a local MP that is one of the 'good ones' - and, believe it or not, you do get them, in pretty much all parties - you can vote for them to keep their seat, secure in the knowledge that it will have fuck-all impact on the result nationally, which will be a Labour landslide.

And then go and have your last pint and meal under a Tory government. It might be a while until the next one.

Indeed, it might well be never.

Pho what it's worth

I’m sure I’ve mentioned this before, but when I was growing up in South London, Streatham was the place everyone went to eat. It just was. (Well, I suppose it wasn't if you lived in Tottenham, or Edinburgh, or Madrid, or Peking, or Alpha Centuri, but for us in South London it most definitely was!)

Even in the 1980s the High Street had more restaurants than you could ever want. There was the Italian Il Carretto, the American Charcoal Pit that gave me my first taste of ‘proper’ burgers, situated strategically across the road from McDonalds. The Acropolis Taverna served up stuff dolmades and stifado that you'd only normally know if you'd been on a holiday to Greece.

In an age when people still made do with Berni Inn, Happy Eater and the occasional over-Anglicised Tandoori or Chinese, Streatham had a lot of very good restaurants offering genuine International cuisine. (It also boasted, and indeed still boasts, a Wimpy where one could order an 'International Grill' but if anything that undermines the point to which I'm meandering!)

Pull the other one!

In recent weeks there has been considerable debate about Carlsberg-Marston's launch of 'Fresh Beer', a controversial product that has garnered mostly negative coverage before it has even found its way onto the bar.

And I have to admit, I find myself feeling not unduly concerned about this. Yes, it's misleading and arguably the latest in a very long line of wrongs committed by wrong-un brewing conglomerates. But I don't think it's going to be a fundamental threat to the (cask) beers I like to drink.

It's controversial because it's essentially a keg beer, dispensed via a handpump - presumably a full-size one that looks more authentic than the miniature faux handpumps already used for keg dispense, and maybe even one that actually gets pulled rather than simply 'flicked' into the 'on' position. I get all that. But it's just not causing my hackles to rise in a visceral surge of physical disgust.

3.4 Children

It's now been a fair few months since changes to UK Duty legislation made it advantageous for breweries to produce beers at a strength of 3.4% or weaker, and we should be starting to see the effects of this at the bar counter as breweries seek to offer beers meeting this criteria.

Speculation at the time suggested that this could be the death knell for cask ales in the 3.5 to 3.7% range, with a host of new beer launches and reformulations of existing recipes hitting the market in order to comply. But to what extent has this actually happened?

Taste the difference?

Of course, it should be remembered that brewers do get some leeway with regards to deviation from the advertised strength. Cask ale, in particular, is a living, evolving, maturing product that can easily get stronger as it sits in a pub cellar. However, if breweries were to leave, say, a 3.8% beer unchanged and just write 3.4% on the pumpclip, they'd be cutting it very fine indeed, so by and large I'd expect them to be playing with a straight bat and brewing their revised beers 'down the middle' rather than trying taking unnecessary risks trying to get away with something that lurks in the margins. And, theoretically, a weaker beer should be cheaper for them to produce too, though this isn't always the case.

3.4% is something of an iconic ABV in certain quarters, mainly because of Brakspear's Bitter. Back when I was a youngster, before the brewery closed, this was considered an absolute classic session beer, and proof that great things can be done at this sort of strength.

Golden Pints: BV's best beers of 2023

Compliments of the festive season, everyone!

(Yes, whatever anybody tells you, it's still Christmas. My decorations are staying up at least until Twelfth Night, and quite possibly until Candlemas.)

It is, however, a 'new year' which means people like me can definitively announce our favourite beverages from the previous one. Which is exactly what I'm about to do, so strap yourselves in