As it happens, I needn’t have worried. In fact, I feel pretty stupid for having worried about it. I’ve spent the best part of a year enjoying the foodie and drinkie delights of this
area, which are, on balance, a considerable upgrade from the utilitarian manufacturedness of the Wharf.
But it's all change once again.
I start a new job next month, and will be working in Borough (which itself isn’t a bad thing, given the riches of the Borough
market area) but I must admit that I’ve grown to really appreciate Leather Lane, and will miss
being able to come here every lunchtime.
See, the Lane is full of quirky food stalls and takeaways, many
of which I’ve still not got around to sampling. The Department of Coffee and
Social Affairs is just about the finest coffee shop in the world, the battered
sausage and chips from ‘Traditional Plaice’ is probably the heartiest lunch £3
can buy, and then there’s the Craft Beer Company...
It be good
 |
| Beer #4000 at the Craft |
There's a reason why I came here for my 4000th different real ale (Fyne Ales 'Rune') the
other day. And it's probably fair to say that about 50% of numbers 3700 thru 3999 were consumed there as
well.
And while I’ll continue to visit as often as I can, it’ll be
much harder to just pop there when I just feel like some strong ale after an
exhausting meeting or grappling with a particularly annoying spreadsheet!
The Craft rocks. It fucking rocks.
Is it really London’s best pub? Well, I’m open to proving myself wrong, but it seems like a no-brainer that the Craft would be the BV London pub of the year 2011-2012, if indeed there were such an award.
Well, it looks as though I’ve just created this award, doesn't it? And what a prestigious award it is. I’ve created it with shitloads of built in prestige, you see. Shall I hand the virtual trophy over to the Craft right away then? Just give me a few minutes to knock up a logo...
Is it really London’s best pub? Well, I’m open to proving myself wrong, but it seems like a no-brainer that the Craft would be the BV London pub of the year 2011-2012, if indeed there were such an award.
Well, it looks as though I’ve just created this award, doesn't it? And what a prestigious award it is. I’ve created it with shitloads of built in prestige, you see. Shall I hand the virtual trophy over to the Craft right away then? Just give me a few minutes to knock up a logo...
Or how about I try to stop being biased for a moment and see if we can apply some more
objective criteria, hmm? And then maybe compare it to, say, 15 other top pubs in the capital?
I think I see a plan forming...
Rating criteria
The truth is, I’ve been meaning to do something along the
lines of this for a while, and been thinking about how pubs - yes, all pubs, not just ones that I drink in all the time - could be assessed
and scored.
This is what I’ve come up with. I think it’s pretty solid:
Quality of real ale: the pub is awarded between -1 and 3
points, depending on how well the cellar is kept:
-1: Frequently undrinkable
0: Mostly indifferent (or non-existent)
1: Generally acceptable
2: Usually very good
3: Consistently superb
Range of real ale: the pub is awarded between 0 and 3
points, depending on the choice of real ales available.
(This isn’t just a ‘numbers’ game, mind. A pub offering an
ever-changing range of five varied, interesting and unusual beers will score
higher than a pub with 12 standard, mainstream beers you can get anywhere)
0: Non-existent
1: Unadventurous
2: Some pleasant surprises
3: Tremendously exciting
Food: pretty self explanatory, but only worth one point, as I
don’t believe food should be the primary purpose of a pub.
-1: Unpleasant
0: Average (or non-existent)
1: Notably good
Bonus ('X' Factor) points: Bonus points can be awarded (or deducted) for
anything else that is outstanding or appalling which sets the pub apart from
the competition, up to a maximum of +2 or -2.
Examples might include:
1: Particularly friendly and knowledgeable bar staff
1: Interesting and/or historic building
1: Good keg/bottled beers or other drinks - whisky, cider etc.
Or, on the downside...
-1: Prices extremely high for the area
-1: Only pork scratchings available are ‘Mr. Porky
Thus, the maximum rating for any pub is, with apologies to Judge Dread, the big Nine - this would be
a pub with a very extensive range of ales, always served in excellent condition
with a kitchen serving delicious food and a couple of other good things going
for it too, with no negatives.
The lowest possible rating is Minus Four! This is a pub
with either no real beer or only mainstream brands in very poor condition,
where the food sucks and there is a tendency for fights and/or karakoke nights to break out.
Needless to say, pubs that I’d expect to get low scores
haven’t made the shortlist, but it’s a set of criteria that be applied to any
pub, good, bad or indifferent, to prove exactly why it’s good, bad or
indifferent.
Pub #1: The Craft Beer Company, Clerkenwell
But back to the Craft, and if you’ve ever been
drinking there, you’ll appreciate why they’ll score a maximum three points in both
the Quality and Range categories, which gets them off to an extremely good
start.
They normally have more than 15 cask beers on, the range
changes constantly, and includes the full spectrum of styles – light bitters,
milds, strong IPAs, stout, porter, barley wine and just about anything else
imaginable.
The beer is always in stunning condition and the range of
keg and bottled beers is one of the best in the country, which guarantees them
a bonus point.
They don’t have a kitchen, so they’ll neither gain or lose a
point for food, but a second bonus point is available for the excellent snacks –
scotch eggs, pork pies, Soffles pitta chips and the strangely barbecuey Coan's pork scratchings.
It ain't exactly ‘cheap’, but it is Central London, and
their beers are often very rare and very strong, so prices are probably just about fair.
All of this means that an 8/9 score puts the Craft firmly in
pole position, as expected, but over the coming weeks I’ll be applying the same
criteria to a bunch of other London pubs.
It'll take a perfect nine to knock Clerkenwell's Craftiest off its perch, but I have some very good pubs on my shortlist, so who knows what might happen?
You recently asked me to let you know what The Hope on Bellevue Road was like these days vis-a-vis beer. They have either four or five hand-pumps (can't quite remember). I'd say that the condition is on a par with JJ Moon's - shame, really. Usual braying crowd of whatever yuppies are these days. There's a new pub (or bar) with hand-pumps called The Albion (or similar).
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