Enjoy it while you can!

In a few weeks time I shall be 45, and, unless there are some big developments in the health and fitness sector, this probably means that I am more than half way through my life.

That's a sobering thought in and of itself, but getting older pushes me more and more down the comfortable pipe of nostalgia where slightly melancholic memories hold more sway than the contemporary world.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all about trying new things. Drinking new beers, eating new foods, visiting new places - I largely measure my life by 'ticks' - but that doesn't mean I'm remotely comfortable when the old things disappear from the world. 

And they don't even have to be that old.

 

RIP

I was saddened to learn recently of the death of former brewer Dave Bailey of Hardknott. Taken far too young, Dave was someone I probably only met half a dozen times, and with whom I always seemed get into a robust argument, usually on the subject of cask vs keg. In all honesty, I'm not sure we ever had a meeting where we didn't come away thinking each other a bit of a wrongheaded cunt. 

Sorry about that, Dave.

Dave was a decade or so older than me, but, crucially, this isn't some dusty old brewer from the past - this was a guy who was probably more modern in outlook than myself and whose brewing and attitude in general was forward-thinking; futuristic even. 

The past

Which makes me think that if even the present and future can die, what hope is there for the past? Is any of that ever going to come back?

Last orders?

To put it another way, and to try to avoid tying myself into a hideous philosophic knot:

At some point in my life I ate my last Brannigan's Beer Nut. Another time was my final visit to a Happy Eater; my last meal at a Berni Inn; my last King Cone; my last ever pint of Hardknott beer.

All of which happened without me realising the significance of the occasion at the time. (And why would I? We take simple things for granted until we can't do them any more.)

The things I miss make me sad. Particularly the things I can't eat and drink any more.

There is an inequality here. We can indulge our longing for the past by listening to our favourite tracks or watching old films - recordings are essentially eternal unless you're 1960s episodes of Doctor Who - but this isn't true of capturing live experiences, and it isn't true of perishable food and drink either.

I find myself pining for long-departed products, both those from my childhood and those that disappeared more recently (Cheese Moment, anyone?)

Does there come a point in life where so many of the things one likes are discontinued, dead, or changed beyond all recognition that life itself ceases to be worthwhile? A time when however good new experiences are, they just aren't enough?

I know that a lot of things are better now than they were. Technology is better, mostly. TV screens look better. Beer is more varied and exciting. I get that.

And I know that it's a first world problem to be whinging that I can't eat the crisps I liked 20 years ago when countries are being invaded and folks are literally being killed.

I just don't see why we can't enjoy all the benefits of living in the present and keep alive our favourite things from the past.

Without wanting to set off any alarm bells, I do sometimes wonder if it's worth it? And when people who are far more forward-thinking, far more optimistic and far more 'full of life' than me die while I'm still alive, it doesn't really seem fair.

Yeah yeah, I know. Self-indulgent, self-pitying mid-life crisis wankery. 

I'll cheer myself up with a Terry's Pyramint...